Jealousy is a valuable sign
Jealousy is a valuable sign; reach for it!
As a child you hear often you can’t be jealous. You are not suppose to act on it as it is a negative emotion. A negative sensation that doesn’t bring the best out of you. It can make you upset, it can make you moody. You might even like to throw some plates through the room or prefer to give out to others. It makes you forget the best for someone else. It’s all about you. Just because you are jealous.
And that is exactly where people, in this case perhaps your parents, missed a step. How could they?! As now I’m 40 and I have to figure out myself, I could have saved so much time but anyhow, that is a different topic.
Back to the parents in this case, they forgot to explain that you can be jealous and instead invite you to look at this feeling and explore this emotion. As jealousy can be a positive sign. A positive sign in the sense that there is something valuable for you there. It can give you an insight into your desires and seriously; isn’t that something we often long for?
The silver lining here is that a jealous feeling can be a positive or a negative thing and that for itself is a positive sign. Optimistic right?
I hear a lot of people wondering what it is they want or desire in life. So yes, please do, please bring on the jealousy!
When I see something I want and it makes me jealous because I don't have it, I could question myself two things.
First one: How come it makes me jealous? Do I want the same so badly? And secondly, the most pragmatic approach, Is it achievable in any way to go after this thing as well? This thing that makes me jealous.
Obviously, this isn’t easy and no wonder why we often don’t explore. All our fears of what we might come across will be so confronting it can be more soothing to keep these desires locked up.
Once you overcome this challenge and do start questioning yourself these two things, you’ll potentially come to realise a desire is truly unrealistic. Like in “ okay, he will never leave her” or “ some people will never change”. If this occurs try to see it is as your room for growth. I tell myself that I need to understand, feel and accept that I am on my journey. Some wise words of my yoga teacher a long time ago. And that helps! It helps me to tell myself “This is my journey and you are on yours”.
We will need to have confidence that whatever it is you need or want will come to you. Perhaps not as you imagine right now, in the midst of your jealousy, but first things first. Just start exploring your jealousies and see it as a valuable sign. It will bring you closer to what you need. Getting acquainted and start knowing your needs can be so up-lifting. Enjoy it. Enjoy looking at your jealousies.
Just a drop of optimism. Every day applicable, almost effortless.